Losing a relationship can be especially difficult. It’s a life changer. It helps to realize that the first few days, weeks or even months may be the most difficult until you establish a new routine that feels comfortable. Even then, there may be times when melancholy sets in or you feel the loss more profoundly. Whether you were the one that initiated the breakup or it was initiated by your former partner, change is part of the equation. Change can feel uncomfortable if you wanted the breakup or even if you know it is for the best.

However it happens, losing a relationship with a loved one hurts. When a loved one dies, the finality of the relationship loss can be hard to grasp. When a person severs ties, the break can be tough to wrestle with. Either way, you must contend with goodbyes and learn to reconcile your life without them. It’s normal to want your relationship back, to want more time, conversations, and connection.

Getting through a nasty breakup can be one of life’s most painful experiences. The first few days after a breakup can feel like your whole world has changed and it has! Now what? You may wonder if you’ll ever stop feeling hurt and angry, let alone be happy again. The good news is that you can and will recover. Here’s how to start the healing process.